This is the section where I torture your helpless souls with the sound of my 'geetar'. You'll probably notice that I have a love for such effects as fuzz, phasing, delay, and wah-wah. Especially wah-wah. With all the boxes I own, I take up far too much floor space. I have the tendency to turn a potentially decent song into something that sounds like it came from an ancient porno. I got into electronics purely to make my guitar sound stupid. It's a side-effect of listening to too much prog-rock, 70's German stuff, and general 'hippie shit' like Steve Hillage. I love it. It's more beneficial than food!

Anyhow, here are some projects I am, or have been, involved with:


Formed in early 1999 by my younger sister Darinka, on drums, and her friend Michael, who was good at screaming and writing offensive lyrics. They put in ads at local record shops for a guitarist and bass player. The guitar position was filled by Paul and I filled in on bass then became permanent when they couldn't find anyone to replace me. Amplexus is the biological term for the position frogs get into to mate. We disbanded in early 2000 after Paul joined a really bad established punk band who were more interested in pushing a 'more punker than thou' image than creating anything of substance. Paul shaved off his mowhawk in protest and left them not long afterwards.

Homie Hunter is a lovely song Michael wrote about tracking down meathead homeboys, "Adidas-wearing motherfuckers", and blowing the shit out of them. Darinka created the main riff on bass (mind you, she doesn't know how to play bass) and I did the chorus riff. This proves that anybody can write a punk song. As you can probably tell in this song, and others, I like to distort my bass to shit.

Subliminal Coke has a lot of snickery drum rolls by Darinka. I wrote the intro riff, Paul wrote the rest and Michael wrote the lyrics. This one was always exceptionally fun to play.

Stinky Mix was a hold-over from my previous band, Non-Rabbit, which really sucked. I wrote both the music and lyrics. It portrays the cycle of running out of pot, scoring, getting smashed, and then running out of pot again. It contains several in-jokes that only people close to me would understand, but I'm sure most pot smokers can relate to the song anyway.


Füchno, pronounced "FUCK NO!" (like 'techno'), consists of Adam Fandert on analogue synths, sampler and effects. I play guitar through multiple analogue effects. We got together with no intention of playing live. Adam is a long time friend of mine who enrolled with me in an electronic engineering course after I told him about my intentions of electronic sound warping. Since then we've collected, built, and modified a mass of gear and occasionally get together for some coffee and recording. We're so commercial that we should have no problem achieving some groupie status.

Symphony Of Shit - 2nd Movement: Chilli Ravaged Anus Nice title, hey? This was taken from our EP, "Symphony Of Shit" released on Yippie Bean. You wont find it on their website, but nag hard enough and they might sell you a copy. This piece materialised after a friend of mine, Aaron, approached us to do a soundtrack for a film he made for University. "Make it abstract and disorienting" he said. So we did.

Ekkie Tuesday (Blubber) is a nice little dub piece which Adam began and I finished. I did my bass and guitar parts on Tuesday the 18th of December 2001, hence the name. This is the first time I recorded with a miked amp, a Laney VC30 set on the verge of overdriving. Of course, I also used fuzz, wah, phasing, and delay. These things are necessary! The bass was recorded direct through an envelope filter and an analogue delay unit. Adams drum 'n' squirt track was so inspirational I just had to work on it. My guitar part wouldn't have come out so well had've I been in a clearer state of mind.


Not necessarily a band, as such, but a collection of musicians who get together now and then to play. The line-up depends on who is there at the time and has included members of Vocabularinist, The Stinking Badger Of Java, and Ragamufin Posse. Then again, there is myself who isn't in anything really noteworthy. A big thanks goes to Brigitte for giving me the opportunity to play with such fine musicians and encouraging me to "cut sick" when I play.

Spork was recorded on the 19th of November 2000 and is completely improvised. It features Brigitte Kelle on bass, Thomas Bollinger on samples, me on guitar, and the members of Vocabularinist on drums and percussion. You can hear the part towards the end where I switched to my "bashin' guitar", a $100 Strat clone. One can get interesting sounds by whacking your head against it. This song is named after my favourite piece of cutlery.

A Creation Not Of Nature, But Of Science was recorded on the 28th of December 2000 and is also completely improvised. It features Robyn Spear on bass, Thomas on samples, Paul Narkiewicz on drums, and myself on guitar. I think Brigitte was in another room practicing double bass so she was absent for this one. I really love Robyn's fat bassline on this one. She really gives the song a heavy dub feel. I reckon this is one of the best things I ever played on.


This consisted of Brock Slater on drums, Julian Casley on bass, and myself on guitar. It was the first time I'd been in a band where every member was a caffeine addict. We first got together on the 13th of May 2001 and pretty much clicked instantly. For several weeks we didn't have a name until we decided on "Double Fist Funk". Yes, I know it's offensive and has dubious connotations but, hey fuggit, what's in a name? We played a lot of porn-funk with a bit of psychedelia and cheese thrown in for fun. We also giggled a lot. We disbanded due to personal differences but remain on good terms.

Ode To Smut was recorded on the 20th of May 2001 on a cheap Sanyo tape deck chucked in the corner of the room. It's completely improvised and makes me chuckle every time I hear it. Jules has those sleazy basslines down pat. The song paints a scene which is rather naughty but, then again, it was intended that way.


I'm not sure when they were formed but I joined them mid November 2002. After having seen them play at a small club, I tooted my horn and told them what I was able to contribute to the band so they invited me to a rehearsal. My first day with the them started with them thinking "Who the fuck does this wanker think he is?" as they watched me unpack pedal after pedal while I set up my gear. None the less, by the end of the day, they were happy enough to have me in the band. Sunglass consists of Neil Sweeney on guitar & drums; Matt Krusic-Golub on VCS3, OSCar, bass & pedals; Scott Brewer on guitar, bass, pedals & OSCar; me on guitar & pedal arsenal; and Ben Taylor on mixer & pedals. The best label I can put on the style of what we play is Avant-Garde Improvised Psychedelic Freak-Out Space Rock. No, I'm not kidding.

Good Morning Captain: 19 Dec 2002 was, funnily enough, recorded on the 19th of December 2002 at a small venue called "Good Morning Captain" by Ben ("Testing 1, 2, 3...") on a tape recorder in a leather bag. This was the only way to have the recording remain relatively clear as we were planning to be very fucking loud. As we were getting ready I noticed people putting in their ear plugs. All our friends were warned. Those that had no earplugs either covered their ears or ran out to the beer garden to watch us through the window. When it came close to the end, we walked into the audience where we collapsed exhausted into the couches while our instruments sat and fed back. The maniacal cackling at the end is courtesy of myself. I was having way too much fun for my own good.


Around March 2001 I thought I was going to be out of a job since the electronics shop I was working at went under voluntary receivership. Sensing that unemployment would cause an addiction to daytime TV, I went out and purchased a second-hand Fostex R8 reel-to-reel 8-track recorder so I had something to do in my spare time. Since then the shop went under new management and I was still employed there for several months, before it closed down for good, leaving me hardly any time to play with it. Here is what I have done.

Acid Conspiracy was purely recorded to test the machine. I had a reel with 1 minute of tape on it so it was perfect for such a use. This is a true example of what boredom can cause a person to do. It was quickly mixed down, with a pair of delay boxes, in a few minutes when Brock requested a copy for himself. The lyrics can be found here.

Fing Fang was recorded on Thursday 28 August 2003. It was my first opportunity to test out a valve mic preamp and a compressor/limiter that I'd bought a few days earlier. Three guitars, three distortions, an octave box (my bass was at a friends), analogue delay, and a touch of spring reverb helped create this almost 3 minute pop masterpiece. I tell a lie, it's a piece of crap!